Tuesday, August 21, 2007 7:18 AM, CDT

Part II
Dr. Walsh said his hope is that the tumors never come back but if they do it will probably be a very long time before they do. Apparently if I had a lymphoma or non-small cell lung cancer (remember that’s what they thought it was to begin with), they would be able to practically guarantee that the cancer wouldn’t come back. There are no guarantees here but Dr. Walsh did, once again, say, “You’ve never been the typical case.”
As with any cancer, the longer they can keep you alive, the more time the researchers have to come up with more solutions! So, I think I’ve got some time!!
What will I do with it?? I feel like I can do almost anything!!! I can get a job, I can get back to the gym, back to Yoga, back to field hockey. I can feel like I have a future. For some reason, Lauren is obsessed with the age of 16. I think she thinks 16 sounds very grown up and when she reaches that age she’ll be able to do a ton of things. For example, she starts many sentences with “when I’m 16 can I…? “ And it will be things like, “When I’m 16, will you go in the big pool with me?” As far as guarantees go, I can guarantee that when she’s 16, she’s not going to want to go to the Holden Pool with me (oh God, will I still be going??) and she’s certainly not going to want me to go with her into the big pool!!
Katie also plays what I call the age game. She’ll ask, “When I’m 10 how old will Steven and Lauren be?” Or “when I’m in the third grade what grade will Steven and Lauren be in?” The last several months, I’ve played the game with her with somewhat of a heavy heart. Now I can just be hopeful, truly hopeful, that I will be there when Lauren is 16 or when Katie is in the third grade.
I’ve come a long way since I heard my median survival was 12 months when they thought it was lung cancer or the 22 months they quoted me when they arrived at the colon cancer diagnosis.
As I’ve also mentioned, I’m taking next week off from treatment and I spoke with my Uncle Bob tonight and we’re heading to Narragansett, RI for a few days to stay with them. I tried to warn them that we’re five very loud people descending on their quiet home. I’m afraid they won’t like us after we’ve stayed with them but he was pretty insistent!!! J So next week I will have a chemo vacation and hope to also have a little beach vacation to go with it.
The birthday party we went to was to celebrate little Sadie Grace’s first birthday. She was born with Trisonomy 18 and it’s a miracle she has made it through her first year of life. Sadie is her own medical miracle and her parents, Brett and Tracy, threw a bash! The party had a carnival theme complete with a reptile show, pony rides, face painting, a balloon man, a moonwalk, and cotton candy. We all had a great time! Happy Birthday Sadie Grace!!!
On another note, our friend Mackenzie lost her battle with cancer Thursday morning at 2:15. Her parents have lost their only child and our friend Michael is struggling with facing life by himself. Her service is scheduled for this Thursday in her home state California. My heart goes out to Mike as he is left with memories of his wife and the difficult task of moving on.
Elouise: Your post made me laugh very hard…can you believe that Diane does not remember it???
Have a great day!
Love,
Kim